I will be me again--one of my favorites from Barb

Recopied and moved it up! Feeling bad, depressed, crazy... read this one from BarbI have been thinking this for the last couple of weeks. And it is late, so please bear with me and typos. I celebrate 9 months today. 9 months of a nicotine free life, a life without the chemicals, a life lived in the moment, not in the thought of when can I get out of here,smoking cessation, not in the hiding around the corner smoking, not in the gosh, I hope they can't smell me. I live life in the moment. Point- went out with a friend today who never smoked. Shopped, talked, laughed. Went to lunch- big thing- went to lunch. And at no time while in the restaurant did I have to think- "ok, lets go, need a fix". I just ate, drank, talked, laughed,quit smoking now, carried on, acted a fool. With a friend. And never left. Never blew smoke on her. Never got distracted.Wow. About 2 or 3 weeks ago I realized something. I am me again. I am just me again. I am back to my habits and routines. I am back to my thought processes. I am back to my activities. I am just me again. I am not a smoking me. I am not a quitting smoking me. I am just me. Took a while, but Oh My Heavens- I am just me. My point- someday everyone one of us will get here. You WILL JUST BE YOU AGAIN. Only better. I guess my point is I realized a couple weeks ago that I am normal. Just normal. A no smoking normal. Please, if you are struggling- know it comes. It really does. I am just me. And for the record, I didn't even remember it was an anniversary. And then when I did I couldn't remember how long it was. Normal guys. How incredible normal feels. At the end of the day my friend got out of my car- we ended up being out from 8:30 a.m. until 6:30 p.m. - she looked at me getting out of the car and simply said- "it is so nice not to duck the smoke all day". Wow. That is the life I want. Blessings Barb